Monday, June 27, 2005

For Real This Time?

I've spent a lot of time putting up some casually sarcastic commentary on different topics or thoughts...but I've spent a healthy chunk of time reading some rather insightful blogs tonight so here's a real-live blog post. How about that? I'm throwing myself into work again. And I'm oddly comfortable doing it. I miss those days when my friends were all (well most of them anyway) going to classes on college campuses and I was getting up at 6:30 a.m. to report to work by 8 for managerial seminars that lasted an hour - and even though my shift didn't start until 3 p.m. and ended at midnight - I'd work through the day leaving only for an hour lunch sometime before my shift and sometimes one during my shift. Don't get all excited because I was paid salary - so it's not like I had any monetary incentive. But regardless, I miss those days. When you put everything you had into a job. You liked the people, you had fun, you put out fires and you logged your hours as creating a foundation for a company that could be successful. Of course that is a load of bullshit. I'm just getting too damn emotional lately and throwing myself into work keeps my head straight. Due to some financial aid complications I couldn't take any summer classes this semester so I've got some free time - and it is better spent working than anything else. So I come home, I make dinner, I turn on the computer, get out my files, lists of things to research, etc. etc. and get to work. Well into the night. In my lil apartment. Is there a problem with this? Probably not so much. When school starts I'll spend the time after work researching things to help with the story ideas that I have tucked away - waiting to be toyed with and turned into Pulitzer Prize winning pieces. The only problem is that I never get out of the damn apartment. Not a good thing for a 25 year old girl who isn't getting any younger or...anything else for that matter. I realize that I could easily take my laptop to any cafe in the Notre Dame area and at least be seen. At least tempt fate a little. But then again, that would mean that I'd have to buy something at the cafe...a latte. Maybe two. I'm a bit of a coffee addict and I'm a poor one at I choose to come home. Then there's the martini bar/cafe/restaurant just around the corner from work and about ten minutes from my apartment. I could always stop there and catch up on my reading, have a drink... Do I sound like a loser with no friends? That's not entirely the case. They're just in a different circle...the "Married/Engaged/Got Kids/About to Have Kids/Live Far Away" circle. I wonder where Carrie Bradshaw found her friends. Oh, right. New York City. I wonder where Bridget Jones found her...never mind. The point? There is none really, except that I started pondering about whether or not my returning sense of workaholism was a good or bad thing. Now I realize I was just being emotional - so I better get back to work.

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