Sunday, January 01, 2006
It is what it is: 2006
It was the best of times. It was the worst of times. It seems odd that I'm even writing about the New Year. I skipped Christmas, got through Hannukah very nearly comatose and due to recent, inconsistent sleep patterns - passed out around 12:13 a.m. this morning. I was not overly excited about the New Year. But I did my best. I drank 1 1/2 bottles of champagne and noshed on everything in sight. I joked with friends and clapped my hands as the ball began to drop. But like everything else this year - it seemed there was no long, dramatic build up to the drop. When I was a kid it seemed like it took forever for that ball to drop. Now, before you know it it's 11:58, then :59 and then bam. Happy New Year. A billion dollars for a 2 second ball of light. In the year 2005, I have to say that friendship carried the torch. I spent more time playing cards, making dinners, going out (even if I didn't go far) and talking into the wee morning hours. When everything went dark - I had a friend or two. Sometimes three. And without them I don't know what I would have done. Rachel and I listened to each other cry. We tried to stop apologizing to people all the time. We became the kind of friends that don't look to the future afraid that they''ll not be friends one day. Because that simply isn't possible. Kim and I already knew that. This year I watched her get married the one man she always loved, have her first baby. This year brought us Madison and everytime she smiles (gas or not) it can make the most complicated day melt away. And this year - in its final and most unmerciful moments - took away Brandon. The pain of which still stings. There was a moment when Kim and I looked at each other, in the moments after she'd told me he was gone, when our eyes told each other we were not prepared. And we are still unsettled. And we will be for a long time. It was hard to even pretend to celebrate. But at 12:04 when I called Kim's house, she informed me that she and Mike had woken Madison for her first new year. Her voice put me at ease. It was the best of times. It was the worst of times. Every year is just one step closer to what is yet to be (30 here I come) and one step farther from what has already been. So here's to 2006.